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Mitt Romney is a fucking moron. I hope a tornado destroys his house.

FELICITATIONS!

Merry Christmas, Feliz Navidad, Bon Noel, what the fuck ever. I hope everybody makes out like a fucking pirate, drinks lots of eggnog, and parties it up.

HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO ALL.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!`

Y'all have a great Turkey Day! Eat lots, drink lots, be happy and look back on everything good that's happened to you this year.

And...have fun shopping tomorrow, since it's Black Friday and all. I'll be stuck at work for thirteen long hours of retail guitar-selling.

College Love

See, this is what I love about college. I'm sitting here, at a college computer on campus (because my classes are literally light-years apart) and blogging whilst listening to my nifty little iPod. 

This is the life, man. 

Oh, and btw? 

College is such a joke.

Can I Just Say...

...that Secretary Condi Rice is probably the luckiest woman alive right now?

Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert offered to sleep with her tonight.

What the fuck?

Tragedy in London

My heart and prayers go out to all those who were victims of the subway bombings, and their families.

JJ Abrams is the Antichrist

Abrams is gonna kill us all.

I know what you're all thinking. "Oh no, more LOST bullshit."

Nuh-uh. Check THIS shit out.

4 8 15 16 23 42

Flight # 815  

Status - Alert 

Airport - SYD  

Departure Sched: 14: 04   Actual: 14: 08 

Gate: 15  

Arrival: LAX  Sched: 3: 16  Actual: 3: 23

Gate: 42

  • Robert D. West of Santa Barbara, Califorina USA survived a horrific plane crash and is stranded on an island somewhere northeast of Australia and southwest of Hawaii. In the event that I am never found, please forward word of my fate to parents Mr. And Mrs. John West of Tuscon, Arizona. Thank you. --Robert

Oceanic Airlines--Taking you to places you never imagined!

We regret to inform you that Oceanic Airlines has ceased all operations effective immediately. Michael Orteig, President of Oceanic Airlines, released this statement:

"After 25 years of service, we are forced to close our doors. Due to financial difficulties in the wake of the Flight 815 tragedy, we are no longer able to maintain service. We are deeply sorry that we can no longer serve our loyal customers and apologize for any inconvenience our decision will cause."

On a whim, because of PiercedTeddyBear's request, I decided to visit www.mapquest.com and plot the latitude and longtitude using the NUMBERS.

Latitude: 4.815

Longitude: 162.342

Wanna see what I found?

http://www.mapquest.com/maps/refreshmap.adp?zo=1&rand=7616

Northeast of Australia, southwest of Hawaii.

JJ Abrams will kill us all.

BREAKING NEWS

OMFG. Sherlock Holmes...

Watching "The Seven Per-Cent Solution".

Holmes is having a freakout. Watson got ON TOP OF HIM.

ON. TOP. BETWEEN. HIS. LEGS. AND. HUMPED. ON. A. BED.

*DEATHBYHAPPINESS*

Brand New Journal

Testing. One two three...etc.